Couple of months ago or perhaps years I’ve experience the feeling of a heart break from a person I love and trust, perhaps every human being been through this entire situation. I’ve tried to search for answers, reading books, advices and nothing could really heal this painful feeling of confusing, not understanding why especially in my situation when somebody you purely love and trust, just easily lied and leave you without any explanations. You keep thinking what have I done wrong? What happen…its an awful feeling and yes it requires a long process of recovery especially in trust and in building a new relationship.
Most people start blaming themselves, asking what went wrong and try to fix the broken pieces thinking it will all be okay, when its not. Relationship varies; good people met good people but what if good people met the wrong once? This is what you should realize that no matter how much you try to fix it he or she will not return to you, because if he or she loved you in the beginning he or she would never even thought of leaving you in the first place.
Reasons, what may be the reasons. Yes, I question myself that a dozen times trying to figure something which I know it’s impossible to get, then you start making your own conclusion. I took me a long process to start building my self up, build my self-esteem and confidence in trusting others and begin a new relationship but somehow along the way, that feeling of sadness and curiosity still haunts me. It’s not an easy feeling….but you’ll manage, if you are strong.
I did many things, I travel, I went rafting, I hike mountains, I do fitness in gym, I went out hang out with friends having the most of my day trying to be busy, and yes it helps but not for long….this kind of healing only temporary, then I started to realize that to make a permanent healing takes process and a lot of understanding.
In order for you to be able to move on in your life, you got to first understand your current situation and ACCEPTANCE to your current situation, because only through accepting what happen you are able to understand and let go. Especially in my situation, asking myself why he left without any words and explanantion, you just got to accept that he wasn’t the right one for you, and even if you are with him things will not go according what your prince charming will, because he did what you never thought someone you love would. So accept the fact that he left and that life goes on into a different level, and believe by letting go your life will become more wonderful because of all the other people around you that still cares and love you, are always there by your side.
After accepting all this, I did what I call “SELF REFLECTIONS” I started to go deeper into myself, understanding my own psychology making sure I wasn’t traumatized by this event. I keep motivating myself every single day, this include working hard at work and building dreams and mission, this helped me a lot in shaping my thoughts and where I should go and step ahead. At that time I was still on my last semester doing my MBA degree, and you can imagine how stressful it affects me, but I kept motivating myself that I have to win this, I have to strike.
Everyday I tell myself that, when you got the opportunity to be the best to strike and really work hard for a good result, good is not enough for me I had to be the best, so I worked extra hard and this event really gave me the highest motivation I needed, I thought I would fail and let my emotions take control of me, but It didn’t. Day and night I studied extra hard put more effort than I used to before. And the result was satisfactory I had the highest score and I succeed in delivering my presentation during my comprehensive examination the panel gave me an average of 92%, I was very happy and relieved. At the same time job offers just kept coming, my previous company offered me a promotion being the manager in the company and that too gave me more motivation.
You see, when bad things happen in your life, when people hurt you and betrayed you there is always someone else out there trying to make it up to you even though sometimes you don’t quite get it, because you couldn’t absorb and let it in. Our mind and heart are a sensitive organ and it’s the most important organs in our body, we have to take care of it too, by feeding positive thoughts and building motivation.
Another way of healing, is giving back. I took a chance to give my stuff and money I had to the people on the street and miraculous that made be feel much better, somehow it healed me. Its good to see this people smile and that you can make a difference to their life, even if its just a few coin’s. I also did a lot of traveling, that’s always been my passion and I followed my passion, traveling gives you a lot of relaxation and refreshes your mind and heart. Gives you great energy and new motivation of life, meeting new people, creating connections and building network.
I believe bad things do happen to good people, but this event happens for a reason, there is always a reason for everything and because of a heartbreak, you become more aware of yourself and around you, you become more humble, sensitive, caring, hard work and the outcome is far more beautiful than just sitting and crying over someone that just waste your energy in life. I followed my passion and im not going to give up because of heartbreak, yes it did affect me somehow but im making sure it didn’t affect me permanently life is too precious to be wasted for someone who doesn’t even care about you. Your family loves you and always there for you, your friends always support you, you got your dream job and what else do you know….love will come, true and pure love will come, you cant force it. Letting go is hard, finding answer is not easy. But time will tell after you move on you realize the positive things you did and the good outcome it gave to your life and made you become a better person.